Heartbreak

No, this is not about a failed romance. This is about adult life. It's about your best friend getting married and you being unable to attend her marriage because, work. It's about going from "can't-wait-for-the-big-day" to "so sorry Pappu, I cannot reschedule this 😢". It's about spending sleepless nights remembering every moment you have spent with your crazy pal, then replaying the entire conversation they had with you about them getting married and then rehearsing how you are going to tell them that this work thing has propped up which is killing you!

It is breaking my heart into small pieces and then breaking those pieces into smaller ones. Stealing a few minutes from work to watch the live-stream of her wedding, I notice how pretty Amma looks, laughing throughout the ceremony while holding a rice cake or something.

Can't help but think about how for a happy life one works and sometimes misses out on like the happiest moments ever because, work. Woke up this morning, looking for a Harry Potter portkey to touch and be transported to Hyderabad for the Reddy wedding. Tried to divert my mind saying career is important, so you gotta work work work work (Rihanna style). Got fed up with the fact that stars and muhurat decided her wedding date and it's not on a weekend. Remembered that my brother got engaged on a Monday and married on a Tuesday, but worked (from home) till the previous Friday.

While my brain plasters the broken pieces of heart with all this contemplation (=jhootha dilasa), the wedding live-stream and live commentary of my gang-mates on WhatsApp acts as the true medicine. God bless technology! And God bless Mr. Reddy- who now has a lifetime of Mounika's PJs to live with 😃.

Unleashed

As the college comes to an end, nostalgia is expected. But when you ask people to scribble in the Class of 2016 Yearbook, beans are spilled, the town is painted red, inside jokes come out, unheard of friendships speak tons in 100 characters, emotions are unleashed!

As is human nature, each person forms an opinion of others. Some you know inside-out (my GANG members are laughing at this double entendre), while some people are a 50 shades of surprise. Sometimes you read between lines and realize a conversation some x months ago in some y context had some z meaning. Whereas most of the times, you know where you got your hands dirty from and that your partners-in-crime are just airing your dirty laundry in public :P Even if you or your friends aren't involved, but your crushes are, your brain cells are so active you'll just read the entire book of testimonials and connect any and every dots.


You start seeing people in a new light. Like a guy seen as a man of few words is really an encyclopedia  on Rock music. Or a guy I knew as a tough task master, focussed on work work work, has a romantic side.

And then you see yourself through others' eyes. Boy o' boy! You and your close friends are the wild animals who have seen each other naked in the field (well, figuratively). They know your harkartein, they know your takia-kalam, they know your soch-vichar. And you too. So you are mentally prepared for whatever comes out of their "shabdo ki pichkari". And they too.
But when rest of the junta writes about you, many different chemical reactions take place in your "khali-dimaag-shaitan-ka-ghar" :P And when your friends read out stuff written for you, the "chamak" on their chehre only indicates a night long session of leg-pulling and assumptions and conclusions and predictions and endless laughter.

So in the process of creating memories, we create memories.

Solitary Contemplation

People can be with you till the penultimate, but you have to walk alone to the ultimate.

Every person walks their journey alone, as everyone's path is chalked out uniquely. Roads converge, diverge, turn a U-turn, dead end sometimes, or end as a seashore and then you swim. Or row a boat. But cross the river you must.

When in class two, I dreamt that I and two other kids are at the ocean. We're playing and walking on the water. We run till the point where the blue sky touches the surface of water, and then probably we fall out of earth. I had fallen out of the bed, almost.

I would play with five-six friends in school and with two of my neighbours at home, but as far as I remember, I was always alone. Not someone who went out of her way to make friends. In the new school, I automatically became close to other two new kids. It was convenient and thankfully, they were fun. Both loved the Harry Potter series, one of them introduced me to the world of cartoon strips and the other remains my friend till date. Then I switched to yet another school and this place was a culture shock. I didn't think I fit in. But once again my friends were the other new kids, one who followed me to college as my junior , and the other with whom I sometimes go on long walks around the city. A third friend from the third school also went to the college with me, and with her gregarious nature, found many many friends. I, on my part, stuck to my convenient strategy, and my first friends at college were my room-mates. We were inseparable, for two semesters. After which I and my one room-mate had a fallout with the third. Then we had to shift to the new hostel, where the occupancy was two people. I and my room-mate naturally continued our room-mate-ship. We became very close, like best friends. I also found a science geek, an athletic girl, a new kid who joined the hostel to live the hostel life and two more ladies who were my neighbours in the new place. Being in the hostel committee brought more proximity to more people. College fest is where I met crazy seniors and a short-lived crush. Some foreign students who were in my room-mate's class, the good-looking talented lads in our college bands, the CAT prep and towards the end, the last days of sentiyappa also added some people to my Facebook friend list.

New college. A girl walked up to me and asked, "Will you be my room-mate?" As I had absolutely no idea about anyone here, and since this saved me from asking the same question to others, I smiled and said yes. She introduced me to two other girls, a singer and a dancer. We met at the Pond. Newness was the binding factor for all. For a management game, I, my room-mate, the dancer and two other girls teamed up. We sat, brainstormed, laughed and won. In class I met many people, guys and girls from different worlds. I easily made many friends there. By the end of that year, I had my own gang, another group- 'book-o-holics', some committee friends, some more from the senior batch. The gang goes everywhere. We have faced so many things together, spent all waking hours with each other, helped each other for everything, and being the youngest I've been taken care of. So much so that in the start, I would wonder how come the friend-less me became a confidante for so many? Now, they all aren't just my go-to but my be-with people.

Friendship is a drug. It is. They have gone to their roads ahead, and today I sit alone on my bed, as each has to fight their battle alone. I know I have them just a phone call or a WhatsApp ping and an FB/Twitter DM away. Despite the emptiness in and around the hostel, I know they are there. With this knowledge, I'll cross my river.

First Mover (Dis)Advantage

" 

DEFINITION of 'First Mover'
A form of competitive advantage that a company earns by being the first to enter a specific market or industry. Being the first allows a company to acquire superior brand recognition and customer loyalty. The company also has more time to perfect its product or service.

" 

Investopedia 

That's the MBA side of things. First Mover Advantage. I pioneer in First Mover Disadvantage. 

Usually in my college, group assignments submission take place in a queue fashion. A Google sheet is shared with the class, and each group has to enter their group and project details. To avoid being the very first group, everyone fills the sheet leaving first n rows empty, considering n students in each group. And I always fill the sheet at the 11th hour, in total haste. 

So, once I got trapped by this n row trickery, and ended up filling the first group slot. Mine was the first group (=only group) to be axed. We set the bar so low, that all the other groups seemed Einstein-like to the professor. 

Another time, only two slots, first group's and last group's, were empty. I decided to fill the last one. Some of my group members decided to get the thing over with, and enjoy for the rest of the semester, hence the first slot. Meanwhile, a guy from another group lured me to defect into his team, who were also thinking of going for the last slot. Trying to stay loyal to my gang, I declined his offer, and before we knew it, only the first slot was left. 

If you think I'm a nerd, you're right. If you think my misfortunes are only in studies, I wish!

With many genuine problems, most of them solved, some of them unreasonable concerns- the moving in became an issue. Inside-everyone wants to move to the new place. Outside- no one wants to be the first one to move- be called a bitch- a traitor- seen as scared of administration-the stooge who can be blamed and used as a reason for others to move.

Yes, I'm that first mover. Haha, I'm the villain!!

Disadvantaged? 

As I see it, I'm winning. Others 'caught' me moving in the new place, started packing their stuff and have plans to move tomorrow. They accede to my courage, use it as an example and make the move. The sooner one moves in, the faster she gets used to the new things and sooner does she get back to normalcy. Many friends come and see how I have arranged my new room, they borrow my layout, feel re-assured, bring more friends and they see it too. Some find my decorations not so cool, make a blueprint in their minds and smirk at my poor arrangement. All of those who see me see how happy I am. This is a clear advantage :)

Tea in Coffee Lovers' Central Perk Mugs,
 that's a lethal mix :D

Girlies, I can only tell you how I felt- while packing, moving, un-packing, arranging, re-arranging with my roomie; we had a ton of fun. You get to know each others' idiosyncrasies, learn a few living hacks, get ideas about a dozen things, love and hate the changes, get absolutely tired, then prepare tea and enjoy it with biscuits in your new room. The feeling- out of this world! Change is inevitable, and if we want it to be, enjoyable. 

Cheers :)

Happyness is standing up for what you believe in,
and sharing it with your friends :)

The City

What makes you fall in love with a city? Last I checked, a guy posted on Facebook that he got engaged, and is in love with the city where he met his fiancee. Years ago, I had seen on television, a cricket world cup match being played in Melbourne. Before the toss, they showed the beautiful sites of Melbourne city, along with the MCG. I had never been there, still I felt like I 'loved' that city. So much so that I told my father, "I'll live there one day, and you'll live with me." Papa of-course said yes to amuse his little girl.

The little girl has grown up, and outgrown that love for that city.

When 12, she moved from the city she loved to a city she had never even thought about. Eight years later, she claimed she loved her new hometown.

Again, years ago, probably around the same time of my love affair with Melbourne, I had heard about Mumbai. Like not just Bollywood, but about the city. Now I don't remember what was what I heard, but I had decided "I want to live in Mumbai someday".

Unlike the Aussie city, I was not too vocal about my decision on Mumbai, because a) I was a child and had chosen Melbourne and b) I was a child and was 'laughed' at by some not-ill-meaning relatives about my wildness to live in a 'foreign' land. In those days, Mumbai too was 'foreign' to me so, probably to avoid b), I kept quite.

 No big issues really. Not then, not ever.

Now, after the two cities I have lived in and loved, it has been an year in Mumbai. Things that are different are that I don't live with my parents now and there are more exciting things than just McDonald's when I was the kid in love with, yes, Melbourne.

Right now is pretty interesting for me. I'm interning- so it's like my first job.  J Office is in Pune, another city I had never thought about. Lovely weather! But I yearn for human companionship. No, I don't work with robots (and I don't think I would like that). There are people, but no one I talk to. Like no friends to hangout with, or just chat for hours together. So, decided to spend the weekend in Mumbai.
Sorry, but no sorry- I love Mumbai :D The City is fun.

12.30 am- late night dinner in Amar Juice Center, Juhu.
1.00 pm- lunch in college with friends
4.00 pm- Mocha Chip and Donuts and talking with a friend in Dunkin Donuts, Powai
4.30 pm- Haiko- to window shop and for AC, and KFC- to use the restroom
5.30 pm-  Mediterranean Focaccia Bread and Coffee in Starbucks, Powai
7.00 pm- Crossword showroom (books ♥)

7.30 pm- Sneaked into a movie hall and watched last 25 minutes of Cinderella
8,00 pm- Watched Avengers- Age of Ultron- the movie whose tickets I had bought
10.30 pm- a non-veg meal at McDonald's
11 pm- on my bed, blogging.

Love for the city bases out of the carbohydrates apparently, but really because of the humans. The friends I talked with. Talking really may have been bitching, gossiping, cursing, giving cold looks to the new people staying in our college hostel, or discussing the clothes passersby were wearing around Haiko/KFC. But without this, despite a fun job in a cool city, life was BORING. Not living in any other city has never affected me like this. Mumbai is The City. 

Takeaways

The four years of my college have completed. There are memories that will always remain and moments that will always come back to me in a good way. That's the hope. There are many priceless things that came my way, and this a list of takeaways:

1. It's easy to get a picture in the newspaper. On page 3. Be at the right place at the right time.

It seems as if we were  listening to the lecture,
but we really were just pretending :P

2. Your best friend's boyfriend!

It's just adorable to see boys blushing. 

3. The fun games we played. The crazy seniors we met.

Informals, SPARSH 2012

4. And the epic matches that we all watched together.

THE 2011 ICC Cricket World Cup
INDIA WON!!

5. Music, SVNIT canteen, GRAMMY . Not just the cool tech fests or testosterone fueled sports events, my great college is a host to many great events which is how I got to meet a Grammy winner.

4th International Congress of  Environmental Research

Shiksha and I with
the inventor of Mohan Veena
Pandit Vishwa Mohan Bhatt

6. WEDDINGS WE LOVE- be it the food loving wealthy Surti shaadis we gatecrash or some of our classmates who are ready to tie the knot. It so happens that as one thinks about jobs or higher studies, at least once the thought of marriage does creep into our minds. And hey, the Red Wedding!


7. It is possible that some of your friends entered the college with no idea about TV and now have downloaded so many gigabytes of TV series or spent so many hours streaming , then watching the episodes online. It's just impossible to talk to each other without a GOT reference these days! And then spoilers...

In the spirit of Hostel Life :P

And so I have friends who are crazy about F.R.I.E.N.D.S. There is a group of gals in my department religiously following Vampire Diaries. I am nuts about SHAMY and TBBT. Some of the guys talk BREAKING BAD. Everyone has watched HOUSE OF CARDS.  My youtube history is cluttered with the Ellen DeGeneres Show, Chandler-Joey moments, Matt Damon-Ben Affleck interviews and I once was in love with the Winchesters.
Meanwhile my best friend has evolved from Naruto to mangas. And of-course the superheroes from Marvel and DC Comics have their own cult following.

8. How can we not talk about the cartoons we loved watching while growing up? The 90's cartoons and movies and Indian television always remain the topics of endless discussions.

Our love for cartoons often turns into heated contests with everything at stake ;) 

9. And the world of Harry Potter. There are pure bloods who have read the novels, the half-bloods who have seen the movies too and the muggles who have only watched the films and don't know the minute details.

I proudly claim to have played and won the HP based scrabble contest once. 

10. Being born is a big thing. Birthday planning for your friends is like a project.

Friends go all the way to kick you out of your
room to decorate it
and sometimes you are a little late
so that candles are now just melted wax!  

Some times
the birthday girl
chooses her own cake

And actual project work is like a hideous wall hanging some one gifted you. You ignore it big time by throwing it away in a pile of assignments, laundry and other such stuff. Procrastination. So just like when those people visit home, you have to take out their wall hanging and dust it and display it-a major tiresome task, similarly with professors and project submission :(

11. GYAN There're many things I didn't know.
 (1) It's not important to have many friends. It's sufficient to have just enough friends who drive you crazy and this is how you survive the real world crap like a piece of cake.

 (2) EK GARAM CHAI KI PYAALI HO... the solution to all problems.


 (3) The driving force to appear in exams is never pointers :P

Boys and Booze :P
Courtsey: SVNIT Trollers, FB

(4) Do what you may, EC practicals will never yield outputs 

12. college ki hariyali

boughs of peace :-)

And the sentiyappa. "Bye bye" fb statuses. Forever together wali Jay-Veeru baatein. Everything one last time. A last lunch. A last dinner. A last ice-cream. A last walk. The last hug and stream of tears. One last time you see your clutter before packing and moving ahead. Memories of last this and last that that'll last long J

You can count on me

Count On Me

- Bruno Mars

If you ever find yourself stuck in the middle of the sea,
I'll sail the world to find you
If you ever find yourself lost in the dark and you can't see,
I'll be the light to guide you

Find out what we're made of
When we are called to help our friends in need

You can count on me like 1 2 3
I'll be there
And I know when I need it I can count on you like 4 3 2
And you'll be there
Cause that's what friends are supposed to do, oh yeah

Wooooh, Wooooh
yeah Yeah

If you toss and you turn and you just can't fall asleep
I'll sing a song
beside you
And if you ever forget how much you really mean to me
Everyday I will
remind you

Ohh
Find out what we're made of
When we are called to help our friends in need

You can count on me like 1 2 3
I'll be there
And I know when I need it I can count on you like 4 3 2
You'll be there
Cause that's what friends are supposed to do, oh yeah

Wooooh, Wooooh
Yeah Yeah

You'll always have my shoulder when you cry
I'll never let go
Never say goodbye

You can count on me like 1 2 3
I'll be there
And I know when I need it I can count on you like 4 3 2
You'll be there
Cause that's what friends are supposed to do, oh yeah

Wooooh, Wooooh
you can count on me cos' I can count on you

No sorry , no thank you?

Friendship means no sorry , no thank you. Really?
Well, sometimes these very words get you friends. And sometimes these very words save you friends.
Meghana is a sweetheart. I don't know what I may be to her.... I hope she considers me well too.

Prior to this Hostel Day ,  I had a string of exams , with professors telling a day before conducting 50 marks practicals and quizzes, sometimes twice a day, back to back. Sleepless nights have never really happened to me, and have always fared well enough in tests. I basically don't fear exams the way people usually do.
Head aches and nervous jitters happened to me in an unpleasant , uncommon way.

Of course, me being the JHS (you could picture JHS as second in command, on any funny sunny day) had to play an important and tiresome role in making our beloved hostel's "DAY" a great one. I had it worked out with Nupur (HS), another girl whom I dearly like and Meghana (JHS herself).

Catering was being looked after by Priya Agarwal , a first yearite , who reported to me and I to Nupur as well as our warden.
Meghana and me spent our good one and a half hours deciding upon a theme for the D-Day and then the next day I spent my four lectures designing a poster-notice for the same.

Then, on a rare four days back to back holiday, I went vacationing with my family to a resort after which came the above mentioned string of exams, tying me to my books and a new found fear.

The whole week was traumatic , as the practical exams showed no outputs and hostel day preparations poked me from left, right and center.
In between journal completion, Bhumi and Radhika made me help them write a letter to the Hostel Section to ask for funds for the Hostel Sports Day.
The next evening I , along with Priya, my room-mate and our mess auditor, designed a poster for the article writing event with loads of excitement , wishing many entries would pour in and we would have a nice time judging these entries. Meghana was among those to compliment us for our poster. Of course Bhumi again asked me to write up a little poster for the most awaited Treasure Hunt .

Exams finally came to an end on Friday, and Priya got really unwell. We decided to see a doctor on Saturday, which somehow got postponed till Monday.
Monday was our hostel day.
While people hated us for our conspicuous absence, we spent horrible moments at that horrible hospital, Priya still not feeling a nano-metre better.
At around 7pm, all dressed up, I went downstairs to find Meghana and a few other girls doing last minute decorations and then came a sour comment from my sweetheart: "So you found some time off?"

I  felt a little sad, then super angry, then full on hatred came all over me.

Next day I heard Meghana had cried the whole morning and was admitted to a hospital for seriously ill health.....

..... After 3 days, and many unpleasant stares and whispers and unkind comments about my "lack of participation" in the hostel day preparations and finally after I couldn't take it any more, wrote a little get well soon apology card to Meghana.

RIDZI

This is a story about a tall girl by a  short  girl....... Short  one met the tall one on the first day of college  both trying to find the location of EM lab , sem 1 

Ridzi joins AIESEC and dedicates as-they-say her "SOUL"  to this organisation and finds many friends and a few "friends"..........   

Ridzi's world famous ACTIVA is our B-Div's  public transport...... weneva you are hungry, wanna make a trip  to canteen or galla , have forgotten your assignment at your hostel or  its a rush-last-minute job, ask for *KEYS* ;) 

She's super famous and has a spider's web of contacts!!! ( though  she denies this and says  meri toh kisi ke sath bhi interaction nahi hai....!! :P)

She makes me go green with her
a) Academic Record
b) way with the professors (she won't accept this but we all know.... )
c)her luv story
and many such things....

EXAM TIME:
SHE'S NERVOUS LIKE HELL AND THIS MAKES US ALL EVEN MORE NERVOUS!!
HER NOTES SAVE ME, MINE SAVE HER
I ASK HER DOUBTS AT 3AM , WHEN SHE'S FAST ASLEEP
SHE SOLVES MY DOUBTS AND FLOODS MY INBOX WITH HER 100 MORE DOUBTS AT 6AM WHEN I AM ASLEEP!!!!

 As I took it  for granted until our LR  once
said  and then I realised we are close to best friends!!
Well lets just say we are friends who are always
ready to pull each other's legs and hold hands and
feel sad when EC/EDC marks are announced and
ask each other for party for small things

RIDZI...... I WANT BIRTHDAY PARTY!!! :D :P

bereft of something

Being bereft of something, since last few days. Started a short story writing, it turned out to be cool . Really! It was satisfying till some point, then it felt like dragged. No, I didn't drag it any further, just that story didn't last long. Priya by the way was generous in comments and never hesitated to laugh. Gearing up for Anchoring auditions tomorrow. Really wanna make a mark. Anchoring is anyday my cup of tea and just don't wanna miss my chance to be on stage all the time. Priya says I will get selected easily. Abhinav didn't think so. Shashikant ke views  toh I just don't wanna know. My sem results aren't out as yet and mid sem exams of new sem are nearing too. Priya says I should try to be indiferent, though she knows its a tough job. Plus everyone else has already scored handsomely. HMC is irritating these days. Getting hungry all the time. Tears downpour more than often. Don't know what's really missing.

Plus Bombay visit is no where in near future though I'm dying to see my family. And yeah, have decided to shop to my heart's content so as to lighten my mood. And wanna score big time in this PC test.